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PSA

This PSA is actually for the benefit of a friend, not me, although there are times it very well could be for me too.

If someone you are close to or care about seems negative, either lately or always, telling them "you are so negative" will honestly, absolutely, help nothing at all. If you really do care or are concerned about how they are feeling, say so. Take the time to say more than the obvious - most likely this person already knows they are negative as they probably feel like crap. Ask your friend if they are doing okay, or if something is bothering them, or if they need anything. Trust me, that will be so much more meaningful and helpful than simply telling them that they are negative. One of the surest ways to make someone who is already feeling negative feel even worse is to point out their negativity.

Comments

md said…
I'm recently dealing with this with a close friend. so true!
sometimes we have to slow this world down, and seek to understand those we care about, and we don't even have to fix the situation, just being there to listen is the best thing sometimes.
July 30, 2009 at 4:05 PM
CoachLiz said…
I have always found that chocolate and ice cream work well in these situations unless the person is moaning about their weight. After that, a good movie helps.

Some people have not had opportunities to work with tactics to handle stress and disappointment. They forget to recognize that in the face of hard times, things could be worse and to thank God for the challenges that they do have that will make them stronger. It is not an easy thing to do because our society encourages people to feel like the victim.

My one word answer to challenges is PERSEVERANCE and I have it engraved on a bracelet that I wear. Just like many companies have a mission statement that they follow, PERSEVERANCE is my mission statement. Help your friend find their personal mission statement.
August 6, 2009 at 3:23 PM
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