Interactions with some people – friends, acquaintances, even complete strangers – are such an awesome breath of fresh air. You know the ones – they leave you not only with a smile on your face, but with joy in your heart. I just had one such “encounter” – a phone call from a friend I have not talked to in a while – and it just left me with a little more joy in my heart than was there before we talked. I constantly thank God for people like that, and for such encounters – they can be as simple as a quick hug from an old friend or a wave from a total stranger, or as long as spending a day with someone “who gets you.” I had a similar experience in Beaumont recently on a bike ride. I spent a good three hours riding, talking, and hanging out with someone I have known for a while, but not really known, and I was left just thinking “wow, what an awesome person, and how fun to get to spend time with them.” That same ride I briefly spoke with a couple afterward who also left me with a happy heart – they are both wonderful people who have had some hellish experiences over the past few years, but you’d never know it upon meeting them for the first time – their faces just light up the world and make it a little bit of a happier place. I guess in a perfect world, you would only surround yourself with these kinds of people, and your only encounters would be the ones which would leave your heart overflowing with joy. But, we know life isn't always that way, and not every person or experience is going to leave your soul feeling full. As bad as some of the bad can be, I guess it has to be there to make the good that much sweeter.
Sigh. Here we are again. We knew all along we would be able to start the process for baby #2 when Sloane was nine months old. I had said we did not necessarily want kids that close together, but knew just because we started then did not mean we would get pregnant then. If I had only known how true that is becoming. Silly us had started having visions of three kids. The only way we can have three kids is to have things go smoothly, not lose embryos, and not lose time. Well, so far we have lost an embryo and a lot of time in the quest for our next baby. I breezed through prep for our transfer in early May. The stress load was so much less than before because I thought we had it figured out. We had Sloane as a great distraction. My lining was better than it has ever been before - by far. Then, the day after Mother's Day, I found out it did not work. And I was immediately thrown back into the depths of infertility hell....
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